Welcome to my online journal.
*Click on the "archived posts" link to the left to view past entries
We received the following letter from Erin on June 1, 2006:
Hello, hello everybody! I'm still hangin' out here in Zambia, and everything seems to be moving along pretty smoothly... However, last night while I was sleeping, my mosquito net fell down (termites ate through the rope holding it up). When I woke up this morning, I almost hyperventilated because I immediately thought that the world was flipped upside-down and I was somehow sleeping on the top of my net instead of on my bed! Remember, my malaria meds are slowly robbing me of my sanity!
Well, not a whole lot has happened over the past few weeks, but I do have a few stories to tell. I am going to start off on a serious note, but then things will lighten up, I promise. Enjoy!
The Reality of HIV-AIDS
On May 5, 2006, I attended 2 funerals. They were both here in my village within walking distance of my house. Both were for children... They both are believed to have died as a result of HIV. I would probably have to say that this was the saddest, most disturbing day I have ever experienced.
The first funeral was for a 12-year old girl who was born HIV positive. Her mother was also HIV positive and died when she was very young. I was told that she had been suffering for a very long time and finally passed away as a result of diarrhea. The second funeral was for a 1-year old baby. The child had died that very morning and I was taken to view the body just an hour or so after death... It was the most heart-wrenching thing I have ever experienced! A group of mothers surrounded the little body, wailing and crying. I would have sworn that it was a newborn - it couldn't have weighed more than 10 or 12 pounds. I later found out that the mother to this baby has lost 4 out of 5 children. She has 1 child in the 3rd grade and none of the others survived their 1st year. She is rumored to be HIV positive, but she refuses to get tested... She is probably in her mid-20s.
I won't go into much more detail about the funerals (...but of course, if you're interested, please write and I'd be more than willing to discuss). However, I think it would be appropriate to share with you a brief excerpt from my journal about how that day affected me:
"...All in all, today will be a day that I won't soon forget. For the 1st time I have seen the devastating effects of HIV/AIDSs... I feel like a wisp of HIV has crept into my soul. I don't want it there, but it's like I'm infected with the virus. - There's no turning back on what I've experienced today. AIDS is real and it's heartbreaking and it's killing little children who've barely begun to live...
...I knew this day would come - when I would have to deal with death in my village or witness the effects of HIV/AIDs firsthand, but I wasn't ready for it. I wonder if anyone ever truly is. I feel like I've lost something today. - Like a piece of me has been chipped away. Perhaps it was my naivety that I lost... Maybe I'll no longer see HIV/AIDS as this problem that belongs to the world because I have been touched by it, and it now belongs to me as well."
The Rabies Scare
As promised, here's a scene from about 2 weeks ago that portrays a much more typical "Day in the Life..."
I had just cooked supper (rice with soya pieces and onion) and fed some to my cat (let me note that my cat was acting completely normal at this point in time). As I was sitting outside reading next to a candle, I heard the cat in the house - growling. My 1st thought was: "That's weird. Maybe he's found a snake or something." My 2nd thought was: "Or, maybe I fed him an onion and he has heartburn". (Don't laugh! It could happen!) A few minutes later he came back outside and hid beneath my chair - still growling.
Now I'm thinking: "Oh God, he's rabid." I shine a flashlight at him to find that he is perched beneath my chair with a big frog in his mouth. No wonder he's growling- He caught a frog in the house and now he doesn't know what to do with it! I was tired of listening to his growling, so I picked up my chair and moved it inside. The cat then ran to the side of the house, frog in mouth. I cleaned things up and made all of my nightly preparations for bed, and usually the cat would be in the house by now... So, I went outside to find it in the same spot, still growling, with the frog still in his mouth. I threw a few rocks at him, trying to startle him so he'd release the frog... (Okay, okay. I'll be honest. I threw a mud brick - but it's not like I hit him!) Anyway, he finally dropped the frog. He still lingered a bit before coming inside, which is quite strange because usually I can hardly keep him out of the house.
So, I was about to get in bed when I noticed that the cat was sitting on one of my duffle bags (where he likes to sleep), but he seemed really tense or on edge, and he wasn't meowing like he normally does. I shine my light on him and he's foaming at the mouth!!! It was a lot of foam too. It was literally dripping from his chin (and he slightly resembled a little kitty version of Santa Clause). At this point I thought: "Oh God, it is rabies!" - Okay, Erin, don't freak out because maybe it has something to do with the frog - Aren't there poisonous frogs?
Regardless, I didn't want the cat to attack me (because he seemed a little freaked out himself) and I didn't want to risk trying to pick him up, so I led him outside by acting like I was going back outside. I remembered learning that rabid animals become afraid of water, so I put his water bowl between the 2 of us... He didn't seem to even notice it. Then I sort of splashed it at him and he ran off into the bush.
At this point I did what any sane person would do... I went in the house and locked the door. I then weighed my options about what to do next and realized that I was in the midst of a major moral dilemma! If the cat was indeed rabid, then I had a moral obligation to protect the villagers from the killer animal I just let loose on them, and therefore not let him wander outside all night. However, if he was indeed rabid and I tried to capture him - what would I have done if he bit me? It was already dark, so I would have been forced to wait around until morning before I could seek the proper medical attention. And even then, who knows how long it would take me to get to Kasama? How much time does one have between getting bit and getting treatment? I don't know! So, it was in my best interest not to handle the cat and leave it outside until morning. Isn't my 1st responsibility to care for my own safety?
So the cat stayed outside. However, I was inside letting my mind run through all of the different scenarios of what could possibly happen next... What if my neighbor children see him and try to play with him? What if one of the them gets bit, what do I do? What if they die? Would PC provide me with a lawyer? Could I live with the guilt of having killed a villager? But the cat's not old enough for rabies shots, right? Therefore, I can't be held completely liable, can I? I'm too young for prison! And it would be Zambian prison! I may never see my family again - augh!!!
I have a feeling the stupid cat probably got a better night's sleep than I did. Before going to bed I decided that I would find the cat 1st thing in the morning and go from there - meaning that I would bike to the nearest village that has a PCV and ask her what she thinks I should do. Otherwise, if I can't find the cat in the morning, then I would have to walk around my village warning people that my cat might be dangerous and to stay away from it... Doesn't that sound like a great way to get integrated into the community!
Well, the following morning my cat was waiting for me on my front porch. Other than looking cold and hungry, he appeared completely back to normal, and my night of stressing over the "Zambia vs. Erin" rabies trial was all for naught. I came to the conclusion that the cat must have been munching on a poisonous frog... Good times. Good times.
In the Local News...
I found out that last week there was a murder which took place in a neighboring village (About 15 km away. I bike throught it all the time). An 11th grade boy killed his uncle with an axe. The uncle was found with the axe wounds on the back of his neck, like the boy was maybe trying to chop off his head! The police were searching for the boy and found him 2 days later, drowned in a nearby river. It is believed that he committed suicide... The standard penalty for murder in Zambia is a life-in-prison sentence, and they think that is why the boy decided to kill himself too. (On a side note... Life in prison?! I wasn't completely over-reacting about the rabies thing!)
So that's all of the drama in my life for the past few weeks. I am still living out of my duffle bags and backpacks because my carpenter hasn't gotten around to finishing my table and shelves yet. Also, there is a village thief, because someone has stolen my solar iPod charger and a sports bra that was hanging on my clothesline... They are both equally useless to whomever stole them because I've probably seen the same number of women wearing bras in the village as I have seen people listening to iPods! Oh well, such is life.
Thanks for your love and support. Please keep Zambia in your prayers!
Shalenipo,
Erin
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